Abstraction

Well, it’s only been a week or so since my last post, but based on the carryings on I’m getting via email, you’d think that I’ve engaged in some terrible betrayal. Sorry about that.

I do have an excuse: I’ve started a new job. It’s a good excuse, because it’s a high stress event. Here’s proof:

Divorce, death of a loved one, job loss—it’s not surprising to find life events like these on the high-stress list. But marriage? A new house? A personal achievement [such as a new job]? Sure enough, these “good” events are stressful, too.

“Your body reacts to stress in the same way regardless of the cause,” says cardiologist Gerald Pytlewski, D.O., of Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network. “The level of stress hormones goes up, and if the stress continues over time, it elevates your cholesterol, blood pressure and heart disease risk.”

See? And note that the fact that this is some random quote from the internet that happens to support my premise doesn’t for a moment dilute it’s truthfulness. I mean, it’s not divorce or death, but it’s up there.

Anyway, I’ve started a new job. It’s not my first new job, either — I’ve done this a couple times, and I’ve learned something about new jobs over the years, and since it’s on my mind I thought I’d jot them down.

Start before your first day
For much of my career, I didn’t think about my new job until the moment I found myself sitting in an unfamiliar area surrounded with unfamiliar people. It’s much easier if you prepare for the first day by talking with everyone you can. Talk with the person you are replacing. Talk with people on your team, and teams with which you are going to be working. I usually make a list of the half dozen or so people that are likely to be most important in my new role, then I write an email asking to set up a quick phone call to introduce myself and talk about the role. This doesn’t have to be a big production, and it can be kept fairly informal, but it gives you a chance to form some initial relationships and get a “feel” for the important issues facing the company in general and you in particular.

Talk with everyone
People are most productive when they have working relationships — when they are part of the corporate “family.” There’s no magic bullet toward making this happen — it takes time. You can jump start the process, however, by making it a point to introduce yourself and say hello to absolutely everyone you see. Schedule in person meetings with the half dozen people you spoke about on the phone. Don’t wait for people to come to you; make yourself easy to meet and easy to talk to. Ask about the company, the products, the customers, the competitors, anything and everything you can think of.

Be conservative
Be careful how you express yourself, however. When you’re the new guy, there is a strong temptation to prove your value (your amazing intelligence, the formidable breadth and depth of your knowledge, your heroic past deeds). Resist this temptation. Everyone you meet will assume that they are the expert because, as the new guy, you know nothing. Frankly, they are probably right. Even if they are wrong, pretend otherwise. Give them the opportunity to have a forum in which they can teach; it’ll win you friends.

Of course, it goes without saying that you should avoid potentially controversial or contentious subjects such as religion or politics. Laugh at jokes, but avoid the temptation to prove that you are funny (or cool, or worldly) as well. Avoid expressing strong opinions about work-related matters. Collect as much information as possible, ask as many questions as possible, but don’t pass judgement. Even if you are right — the website might actually be pretty awful, the collateral poorly written, the business plan short sighted, the accounting sloppy, but talking about it probably won’t win you any friends and is likely to earn you some enemies. The company got along just fine before you arrived, and it’s amazingly easy to say or do something that causes people to wonder who the hell you think you are.

Read everything
You’re pretty stupid going it, and it’s important to become less stupid as quickly as possible. Read everything you can about your company, your products, your competitors, your technology. Everything. Then read it again. The faster you become fluent in your particular “language” the easier it is going to be.

Find an easy, early win
If you’re talking with everyone, reading everything, and making friends, some opportunities to contribute should become pretty clear. Unless you’re in a position in which your boss is laying out things he/she specifically wants you to accomplish, you need to identify some accomplishments yourself. It almost doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it is possible to achieve within a couple months (at most) and is accepted as a legitimate accomplishment that moves the business forward in some small way. At all costs, avoid the situation in which someone says that you are “off to a slow start” in any context (e.g. if something says “he’s smart, engaged, wonderful, and, though he’s off to a bit of a slow start, I think he’ll really be an asset” really means “he certainly seems capable, but he hasn’t accomplished anything yet.”

Oh, yeah, and a sixth bonus tip:

Give yourself a break
Starting a new job really is a difficult, stressful thing to do. You know no one. You know nothing. Every detail, down to the nearest rest room and how to file an expense report, is new. You aren’t going to swoop in and change the world, so don’t beat yourself up as you ascend the learning curve.